Ryan's Weekly Tip for Homeless, Mentally Ill and Addicted Patrons, 12-26-17

From Ryan Dowd:

If someone is shouting at you, it can be tempting to raise your volume to match theirs.

Don’t do it.

Here’s why:

• An angry homeless patron will always be at least one decibel level above you.  If an angry patron is at a decibel level 3 and you raise your voice to level 3, where will he go?  Yup, level 4.  If you then get louder and join him at level 4, where will he go?  Of course, level 5!  It is an arms race that you cannot win. 

Instead of following a homeless patron into a shouting match, you want to lead him or her into a quieter conversation. 

It works like this: 

• If an angry patron is at a decibel level 5 and you want him at a level 3, what is the loudest you can be?  Yes, level 2.  If you want him at a level 2, what is the loudest you can be?  Correct, level 1.  The trick is to accept that an angry homeless patron will always be louder than you, so you have to speak more quietly than you want him or her to speak.

Bonus Tip:

• I find it helpful to speak absurdly quietly when someone is shouting at me. If someone is shouting at me and I respond with whisper, it can be very confusing to someone who expects me to shout back.  More often than not, they whisper back without me having to ask them to be quiet.

Did you think this was helpful?  Send it to a friend! Did a friend send this to you?  Email me at ryan@homelesslibrary.com and I'll add you to the list!

Have a great week!

Peace,

Ryan

Ryan Dowd, Atty., MPA
The Librarian’s Guide to Homelessness
www.homelesslibrary.com